Heartbreak in Conroe

Several weeks ago Conroe First United Methodist Church, with approval from Bishop Janice Riggle Huie, placed their Senior Pastor on sabbatical until he can be appointed to another church. They did this because he and his wife refused to forsake their gay son. It was necessary for me to express my thoughts and feelings to Bishop Huie about these events. Here is my letter to her:


Dear Bishop Huie,

I have been a member of Bering Memorial UMC since 2002. When I joined the UMC I did so with full knowledge of the discriminatory and heartbreaking language of the Book of Discipline regarding homosexuality. I joined because I believed in my heart and my mind that the UMC wanted to do the right thing and would eventually embrace all people as full members in the Body of Christ. As a result of the events at Conroe First UMC, and your apparent support of those events, I am no longer convinced that the people of the UMC or those in authority want to move forward into a world where we treat all people as Christ taught us.

Years ago I served the Mormon Church as a fulltime missionary. I spent many hours ‘bible bashing’ as it related to which church was right. I have no intention of engaging in that endeavor today as it relates to homosexuality. I know my truth and I know that we fear what we do not understand and that as human beings in order to believe we are enough we find it necessary to condemn others.

I was excommunicated by the Mormon Church for being a lesbian. It was a crushing blow that impacted my life for decades. When I got sober in Alcoholics Anonymous it started me on a spiritual path that eventually enabled me to once again embrace my faith and belief in Jesus Christ. The last five plus years at Bering have been transformational for me. I believe I was called to be a part of Bering and recently I believe I have been called to ministry – I am still discerning how that ministry might be made present in the world.

My struggle is that I do not know how to tell the Good News to those I love in the GLBT recovery community. This is a community that has been so damaged by the world, organized religion, and in many cases their own families. Many are un-churched, but, sadly, more of them want nothing to do with Christianity. They see it as discriminatory, elitist, and divisive.

How do I invite them to experience Bering and the UMC? Do I tell them that they can find open hearts, open minds, open doors at Bering but I can’t promise them that if they venture outside of Bering into the UMC as a whole that they won’t be greeted with discrimination and disdain? Do I tell them that they can become a disciple of Jesus Christ at Bering but they can’t be an ordained minister? Do I tell them that we will support them in embracing a committed, monogamous partnership but we can’t celebrate that union in our sanctuary and that our pastor cannot bless their union either? Even more tragic do I tell them that the UMC, as evidenced at Conroe First UMC, supports their own parents in forsaking them?

I don’t know what else to say Bishop Huie. I feel like my words fall on deaf ears. I write to you though because I need to stand up and speak my truth. I love Bering and I love so many things about the UMC. Today though, I hang my head in shame. I pray that my heart will find a way to forgive and move forward.